You Always Burn the First Pancake

An Amazing Message.

2010-04-13T12:32:00.000-04:00

New Invention

2010-03-21T14:17:00.000-04:00

Maya has come up with a few new inventions. I will post them as the thoughts arrive. The latest invention is the "No Hair Mirror." She said when you look in this mirror, you won't have any hair on your head, just hair on your body, like a bear.

This might be the best invention ever.

2010-03-09T16:14:00.003-05:00

My Magical Elf.

2010-02-27T02:30:00.001-05:00

Maya believes she is part elf. I think this comes from countless viewings of the movie, Elf. She also believes she has "magical powers". I asked her what made her believe she is part elf. She said it is because she has pointy ears and can have "burp ups". (See previous post) You may not have noticed her ears... well, me neither. I'd say they are marginally or even remotely pointy. Burp ups? Well, this is a term Maya has coined referring to her hiccups. She kinda makes a burping noise when she has them. According to her, these are things that constitute magic.

The other night, Maya asked for something to drink at bedtime. She knows she cannot have anything with sugar after she brushes her teeth. I offered her a glass of water instead of the chocolate milk she requested. She was hesitant but I reminded her the importance of drinking water. "You should really drink about 8 of these a day," I said pointing to her small cup. She said, "I will drink eight sips, Mommy." I figured it was better than nothing. She proceeded to take small sips. I said, "Don't you feel better when you have water to drink?" She said, "Eight sips of water will give me magical powers. I'm part elf, you know." She likes to tell me this insider information each time she does something cool which she thinks is somehow related to her super powers.

"What magic am I doing now?" she said. She was watching a video in a dark room when she asked. I said, "You are glowing." I meant that as if the water made her skin look good. She said, "That's not magic, Mommy. That's just the TV."

Silly me.

Melody the Homemaker

2010-02-27T02:15:00.001-05:00

Well, I haven't worked a whole lot lately and so I have had LOTS of time to work on my home. I want to get everything organized and clean so that it won't be hard to maintain when I'm busy. My father in law is visiting while he paints and gets his house set up. He moved here from Utah and bought the home we just moved from. It's interesting to have another person in the house. I feel I am more likely to keep the house clean and prepare home cooked meals. I kinda like doing that.

It is interesting to shift from working woman to stay at home mom. I get to do wonderful things like have playdates and spend more time with my girls. I feel so close to them right now. I think the hardest thing for me in the past was to force myself to be structured and productive at home when I'm not working. It may not make a lot of sense, but I am much more organized when I am busier. Since we have moved, I have been able to keep a schedule and stick with it.

I have met one of our new neighbors. She came over with pumpkin/chocolate chip bread in hand. She has a son Maya's age. She loves Craig's List and Ikea... what more could I ask for?? I told her I thought we would get along just fine!

So, now that I am comfortable and feel that my house is under control, I figure there will be some major upheaval just around the corner. I'm not a pessimist, I just believe the Lord doesn't want us to be stagnant. I also feel I can finally handle two children... uh oh, you know what THAT means!

Yellow Springs: Home Sweet Home

2010-02-23T10:32:00.000-05:00

We finally did it. Remember a couple of years ago how I dreamed of this wonderful place to live? I have been visiting, obsessing, and maybe even stalking Yellow Springs, OH. Here's a video of our new dream home.

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My First Born Turns Five.

2010-02-03T01:08:00.000-05:00

I can vividly remember the LONG labor I went through but the last 5 years have passed so quickly. My darling daughter had her birthday and I just kept thinking, "I can't believe she's already five."
We had a breakfast dinner per her request... well kind of. I said, "Maya, today is your special day so you can have whatever you want to eat tonight. What would you like?" "Cake," she said. "Yes, you will have cake, but what kind of DINNER food would you like to eat tonight?" She said, "Bacon." I said, "Well, we can have a breakfast dinner with pancakes, eggs, and bacon." She said, "No, I just want bacon." I said, "I will make a few other things for everyone else to eat, ok?" "Okay Mommy," she said as if I was being crazy for suggesting we have other food.

We had a great dinner... no pancakes. I thought that would be too much since we were having cake. Maya got a smock and paints for her easel, money from the grandmothers, and jewelery making kit. We received a coupon from Mr. Fub's for $3 off and also for a free birthday balloon. We headed over there where she got a purple balloon and used her birthday money and coupon (easy come, easy go) on a chihuahua which she promptly named "Bingo." She even has $5 left over! I love my Maya-chan. She is still my baby, and I still call her "Baby" ;) ...and probably will, even when she's all grown up.

Wow, we can really waste some time.

2009-11-26T21:03:00.001-05:00

Love it.

What have I been doing lately?

2009-10-17T21:49:00.002-04:00

The Flower Turns Two

2009-08-14T08:51:00.010-04:00

I'm Officially a "Coupon Queen"

2009-07-30T16:55:00.004-04:00

I was inspired by my friends, Scot and Daphne, who inspired me to do things the Dave Ramsey way a few years ago. I realized when I am working, I don't have as much time to look for deals. Right now I am barely considered employed. My job has a busy season and a SLOW season. I basically work full-time during our busy season and lately it has felt like I'm on an extended vacation. Vacations are nice, but they always cost money. So, with time on my side and no income from my job, I decided to start couponing. Yes, couponing is a verb.

I initially cut my grocery bill down over $100/month. I thought I was doing a pretty good job before I cut it down, but I knew I could do better. I decided to sign up for e-coupons. You can print coupons from various websites as well as download them to your favorite store's card (save the trees!). Next, I signed up for a weekend newspaper. I did this via a website that offered discounted (up to 60% off) newspaper subscriptions. I then started following blogs that would list sales plus coupon savings. Wow! I never thought of that before. I was only shopping sales and I would use coupons whenever I would run into one.

Here is an example of what I did today. There was a 50% sale on selected Kellogg's products. I hate to admit it, but my family LOVES cereal. I clip all cereal coupons that come my way. I know, it's an overpriced way to eat breakfast... but hear me out...

If you donate $5 or more to Kellogg's Feeding America, you will receive $5 in Kellogg's coupons. With Kellogg's Fuel for School promotion, if you send 10 proofs of purchase (from select Kellogg's products) and an original receipt, you will receive a $10 rebate plus a $70 coupon code from Dell.

Kroger was having a one-day only 50% off select Kellogg's products sale today. I bought 28 products and some milk (of course!) and spent $27 (after rebate). Had I not dropped one of my Pop Tart's coupons, it would have been $26. If my e-Coupon hadn't glitched, it would have been $25. I did email that company hoping I will get that $1. My orginal cost without a sale or coupons would have been $100.92. I basically saved 75%.

I also got gas at Kroger. I got 10 cents/gallon off using my store card.

Below is a picture of all my finds minus milk and some cookies which I left at my mom's house.

"My Mother" by Maya

2009-05-11T11:54:00.004-04:00

Maya did a fill in book for me on Mother's Day. Thanks to her teacher at church, Sis. Pitcher, for putting this together. Everything in italics is what Maya wrote. She kind of filled in some of her favorite things instead of mine, which was hilarious. I laughed so hard at the last line!

My mother likes to cook brownies.

My mother and I like to play at the park.

My mother likes it when I am nice to my sister.

My mother's favorite color is blue.

My mother's name is Melody.

I love it when my mother sings to me.

My mother's favorite food is spaghetti with meatballs.

My mother is great because she reads books to me.

My mother is good at drawing stuff for me.

My mother is 23 years old.

You know you're doing a good job when...

2009-05-08T20:08:00.005-04:00

I always used to keep my car immaculate. I remember going clothes shopping with my friends, Tessa and Jane when I was pregnant with Maya. They already had at least one kid each at the time and knew better than I did about motherhood. We took my car on the trip and they giggled about how clean my car was. They swore to me that it wouldn't last, that my car would soon be covered in cheerios and juice. I swore to them that this could NEVER happen to me! Well, it didn't really until child #2 was born. Here's a snippet of a conversation with Maya recently.

Maya: "Mommy, you car smells so FRESH..."
Me (full of pride): "Really, Maya? Thank you!!"
Maya: "...like french fries!"

So, that wasn't the kinda fresh I wanted. I cleaned my car out from top to bottom a couple of weeks later. It was, well... scary. Not only did I find those infamous french fries, but also some hard-boiled eggs and a slice of summer sausage. Ok, so my husband is a Boy Scout leader and the boys left that one behind. The scary thing is, he hadn't been camping in about 3 weeks...

Family Vacation

2009-05-08T19:36:00.019-04:00

We recently returned from a family trip to Valley Forge, PA. Jeff had a conference for work there and we tagged along. It saved us on many expenses. We visited the Valley Forge National Historical Park and also Jenkins Arboretum in King of Prussia.
We also got to visit our dear friends, the Lasters, who we knew from Birmingham. They live in Lebanon, PA, which was only 1.5 hours from where we were! Below are some of the pictures.

What Would a Child Psychologist Tell Me?

2009-04-24T20:47:00.005-04:00

I try to encourage Maya's creativity. We bought her an easel, paints, and markers for Christmas. Tonight, Reili wanted to join Maya with her "art". I thought it was sweet that Maya was tolerating her little sister. Reili was not screaming or even crying out in pain, so I turned my back (yes, I know big mistake) and let them "play" together.

Maya came out with blood on her knee and a sad look on her face... except it wasn't quite sad enough. I didn't believe it. Yes, it was red (washable) paint. Her sister/partner in crime was slathered in red, too. Here are a few pictures.

Maya even posed for the pictures while Reili kept saying "cheese" while smiling for the camera. I'm wondering at what point to stop encouraging her creativity....

So, I took a hiatus...

2009-04-23T13:12:00.003-04:00

I want to get back into blogging. I guess between Facebook and Twitter, I don't have much left to say.... but I don't get any benefits from those sites. I can't publish it all and call it my journal. I can't pass it on to my children.

I just got back from a trip to my alma mater, The Alabama School of Math and Science, for my 15 year high school reunion. Yup, do the math. What? You can't believe I'm that old? Thanks. I love hearing that one.

So fifteen years have gone by. You would think we were older and wiser and maybe even a little more mature. Ha! I think the highlight of my trip was crashing the prom. It was on the USS Alabama for goodness sakes! Who could resist? We had a blast. I think it was the best prom ever.

We weren't a bunch of weird old geezers hanging around fancy-dressed high school students while longing for days of old. We just went to the prom and climbed around the ship threatening to spit loogies on each other. It was amazing. It was like time had never passed, at least for the moment. I realized that I was a married mom of two but still a kid inside.

Seeing my friends was wonderful. I saw my old roomate, Sarah. She was like a 40-something year old mom stuffed into a petite 17 yr old body back then. Now, she's 34 and pretty much the same. I missed her and didn't even realize it.

I spent a lot of time with my best friends, Ben and Sunita. Memories came flooding back... it was weird. I had forgotten so many things and then my mind opened up and all this stuff came back. I laughed and cried and then cried while laughing. We were such hilarious kids, or at least we thought. Although years have passed, I still feel they are kindred spirits to me. There is a bond there that was never broken and a closeness still exists today.

I had a BBS friend, Jason, that ended up going to ASMS also. He grew up about 15 minutes from my hometown in northeast Alabama. We became great friends. We shared six hour commutes to and from Mobile, and we also spent a school trip abroad in London together. I reminded him of how he and his roommate warned me about this guy I was dating. They told me he was really a not so nice guy and that I should break up with him. Jason didn't remember that, but I remember listening to him and breaking up with the guy.

Wow, what an amazing time. I think my favorite compliment was that I hadn't changed a bit. I think I have physically and maybe even a tad emotionally, but in the end, I was the same old Melody.

That's What Elfes Do

2009-04-11T11:19:00.003-04:00

Ever since Christmastime, Maya has been thinking she is an elf. Her ears might be slightly pointy, I suppose. We also watched the movie Elf quite a few times. More than one elf are not elves, but rather elfes, pronounced el-fez, according to Maya.

This morning, after eating some bacon, the following dialogue was presented:

"When I put oil in my nose, I can smell bacon all day...because I'm an elf, and that's what elfes do."

New Maya Quotes

2008-12-27T23:18:00.003-05:00

Here are some of my favorites things Maya has said recently. I knew I had to write them down or else I would forget.

When Maya is going to the potty, especially #2, she will tell everyone she needs her privacy and will close the bathroom door. I thought she just needed time to contemplate life, but now I understand better what was really going on in that head of hers.

Example 1.
Maya: Daddy, you gotta get out of here!
Jeff: Why?
Maya: Because if smell it too long, you might die.

Example 2.
Me: Maya, are you finished going potty?
Maya (looking down in the toilet): No, I only have one poop. I need to have a poop family.

Kingsley Christmas Letter 2008

2008-12-24T11:21:00.009-05:00

Dear Friends and Family,

We just wanted to save a stamp and a tree by sending our letter this year via our blog. You hope all is well with you and your family. Following the letter are some recent pictures of the girls. You can find more pictures of me and Jeff in the blog... we pretty much look the same!

Jeff has gotten a little more settled with his job. He's in his second year of working as a Materials Engineer for the government. This job has been such a blessing to our family in so many ways. Jeff is currently working on his Master's in Materials Engineering through the University of Dayton. The University has classes during his lunch hour and it is also located right on the Air Force Base.

His job has given him many challenges and wonderful experiences. Jeff has traveled all over the country attending conferences and meetings and he recently made a trip abroad toIsrael. It was a wonderful once in a lifetime experience for him.

Jeff is also very busy with family and church. He is a doting father to Maya and Reili and is a wonderful husband to me. Jeff is now the Boy Scout leader at our church. He works with the young men, teaching them skills that he hopes will help them become great leaders someday.

I worked with two companies this year doing health screenings at corporate work sites. I was promoted to a "team lead" but stopped working in that position after six months. My priorities in life are not work right now, but rather my family. I'm now working with one wonderful company, Health Fitness Corporation. I continue doing health screenings but have also started doing seminars to help people achieve better health. It is quite fulfilling to talk and teach about how to take better care of our bodies so that we can have better lives. I have been able to travel all over the country lecturing and doing health screenings. Some highlights of my travels has been Seattle, Phoenix, and Los Angeles. I love to travel, especially when I can get paid doing it at the same time!

I am working with the women's organization, Relief Society, at our church. I help plan fitness/health events and I'm also doing a monthly playgroup for the mothers and young children. Most importantly I keep busy by being a mom! I only work part-time which gives me time to spend with our beautiful daughters.

Maya has had a wonderful year as a 3 yr old. She is brighter than I could have ever dreamed. She enjoys drawing, painting, reading books with mommy, singing, and playing outside whenever she can. I can't sum up in this letter how amazing she is. You will just have to read previous blog entries to get the gist of what I mean. She is such a wonderful big sister. She tries to teach Reili everything she knows.

Reili is now 16 months old. She is walking, talking (in some unknown language), and is just and an adorable angel. She tries to follow Maya wherever she can, but she definitely has her own unique personality. She has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh. She's definitely a daddy's girl and doesn't try to hide it! As soon as Jeff comes home, she yells, "Heeey Dada!!!" She is such a wonderful addition to our family.

We've enjoyed our second year in Ohio. We miss Alabama immensely, but we are moving forward here and hope our future will be a bright one.

We hope all of you have a wonderful holiday season. May the Lord bless you and keep you. We know that our Savior lives and that he loves us.

With love,

Jeff, Melody, Maya and Reili

It's a hard habit to break...

2008-10-12T20:43:00.004-04:00

Maya: "Uncle Shi, do you still smoke cigarettes?"
Clarence: "No."
Maya: "I quit eating my boogers."
Clarence: "Good."

It's interesting how a 3 yr old can relate bad habits.

Tina, Stop! I'm Gonna Pee my Pants

2008-10-06T01:23:00.001-04:00

When I'm 64...

2008-09-10T11:55:00.006-04:00

Jeff and I went out to dinner the other night. As we sat there, enjoying our childless date, I could hear a droning sound in the background. It was a lady talking to her husband incessantly. They looked like they had been married a number of years. This lady just wanted to hear herself talk and I don't think her husband said more than, "Uh huh" every now and then.

I told Jeff that I was worried we would become that couple in 20 or 30 years. He showed me what his face might look like in two different scenarios...

Listening to me after being married for six years:

After being married 36 years:

The Kingsleys Go Out for Supper...

2008-08-26T03:52:00.008-04:00

Mmm... crab legs. Hey, what a neat little fork they gave us!

Must be some fancy mashed potato fork.

F -

2008-08-23T00:29:00.006-04:00

A recent assignment for my job was to do a Stress Management Seminar. I was asked very last minute, but a Power Point presentation had already been set up. All I had to do was learn it well enough to not stare at each slide and present it to a group. I had two places to do this and on two separate days.

I was asked to hand out evaluation sheets to everyone attending the seminar. I had to then mail all the sheets back to the home office in Rhode Island. The first time I did the presentation, I was alright. I would say I was about a B-.

Today, I was relaxed, I knew my stuff, I talked to everyone beforehand... I barely needed to look at the slides. I had lots of interaction, comments, and I thought I did a good job. Maybe about a A-.

I looked over the evaluation sheets from the first day. I mostly got "satisfactory" and then some people took pity on me and gave me an "excellent" score. I didn't receive any "unsatisfactory" ratings.

Today, I got a lot of "excellent" marks and a few "satisfactory". There was one that stood out, the lone "UNSATISFACTORY".

Not only did this guy find me unsatisfactory, but he was kind enough to add a comment: "You could've had a livelier speaker. This lady was very dry."

Ouch.

Paper Dolls

2008-08-22T19:13:00.001-04:00

...they just ain't what they used to be.

Blog Envy

2008-08-21T20:23:00.002-04:00

Have you ever looked at someone else's blog and wished your blog could be like their blog? I never knew I could have these feelings. It is odd and I may have reached some new level of strangeness.

Envy (also called invidiousness) may be defined as an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another’s superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it."

So there it is and I have it...blog envy.

Here are some blogs I envy and why:

1. Random Thoughts.
This is a fun blog. If you haven't looked at it, check it out. It cracks me up. Why do I envy it? Her last post had 32 comments. I think I get 32 readers in a month. The reason there are so many readers is because the writing is hilarious and she never bores you with long, dull stories. She keeps you guessing. I don't even know her name. (Just kidding) It makes you laugh until you pee your pants (which is sooner than later for some moms out there).

2. The Meservy Monthly. These guys were blogging before blogs existed. This is my sister and brother-in-law's site. They had a monthly family newsletter they used to send out. It was chocked full of interesting tidbits about their interesting family, lives, and stories. Basically, it is very interesting. Love it.

3. De Profundis. This blog is about my best friend, Tami. She is so amazing and I've always tried to emulate her. She is naturally comedic, brilliant, and very well versed. I just love that she is able to travel all over the world, have adventures, and she does an amazing job writing about it. Plus, she is just plain cool.

If you would like to participate in this exercise, please tag your post with “blog envy” and list 3-5 blogs that create deep feelings of envy and jealousy.

My Future Athlete

2008-08-19T21:13:00.005-04:00

Maya: Mommy, when I go to school, I want to play sports.
Me: Really, what sports would you like to play?
Maya: I wanna play the one where you hit the alien in the head when it's in the pool.
Me: Um, where did you hear about that one?
Maya: I didn't. I just made it up. It's called "Alien Dead"
*Maya recently saw part of The Goonies

A Well Balanced Meal

2008-08-19T20:36:00.006-04:00

Is it okay to eat only this for dinner? I bought some lovely Ohio corn on the cob and kinda ate it until I was full. It's fun to be a grown up.

Have you ever eaten an entire meal with only one ingredient?

Amusement

2008-08-18T19:51:00.001-04:00

*from theonion.com

Par-tay

2008-08-16T10:44:00.013-04:00

I don't party quite like I used to, but here are a few highlights of one I just attended. I didn't stay up all night, but I sure felt sick afterwards.

Alabama - home again.

2008-08-15T22:28:00.009-04:00

I grew up in a tiny little town in northeast Alabama. I was a certifiable nerd and my mom was also foreign which made me a bit of an outcast. I didn't understand the people in my town. I didn't relate to my relatives, including my own dad. I left the first chance I got when I was 16. I spent 10 years in a town that I felt was some sort of prison sentence.

I just came back from a trip to Piedmont. Now, 15 years later, I actually kind of miss the place. I miss some of my old friends, my old neighborhood, and even that quaint small town life. Now that I'm in the North, I actually miss my hometown.

Here are a few things that I miss about Alabama:

The sight of Kudzu.

Really good Barbecue.

Red Clay.

..and the fishing *.
*note- the guy on the right was my childhood friend from Piedmont.

One

2008-08-14T01:55:00.010-04:00

Happy Birthday to my little blond munchkin, Reili. Believe it or not, she is one today. We love you!

Reili's First Flight

2008-08-14T01:06:00.005-04:00

You Gas Guzzlin *&$&^%!

2008-08-08T06:18:00.003-04:00

I almost got ran over by one of these yesterday. That's how it is, too. If they pull out in front of you, who wins? He was too busy to notice my puny station wagon because he was texting his buddy as soon as he left the gas station.... or maybe he had to check his account balance after that large transaction.

Poo-Pee

2008-08-07T01:44:00.006-04:00

Me: Maya, are you going poo poo or pee pee?
Maya: Poo-pee
Me: You're pooping?
Maya: No mommy, I'm going poop AND pee... you know, poo-pee.

Pittsburgh and Pink Eye

2008-08-01T13:51:00.019-04:00

We went with Jeff on a TDY to Pittsburgh, PA for an entire week. I thought I'd post some pictures. We ended our trip with a visit to the Columbus, OH Zoo and Aquarium. Why Columbus? Well, the Pittsburgh Zoo and Aquarium is about an hour east of Pittsburgh... not even in Pittsburgh and not even in the right direction. We passed around an nice virus, so you'll see some hotel room pictures in there, too. Enjoy!

Sweet Home Alabama

2008-08-01T13:03:00.002-04:00

Alabama man stabs friend for buying wrong beer
Posted by Associated Press August 01, 2008 9:21 AM
Categories: Crime

MOULTON -- A north Alabama man has been accused of stabbing a friend for returning from a store with the wrong brand of beer.

The Lawrence County Sheriff's Department charged 64-year-old Grady "Skip" Wilburn Dollar with first-degree assault for allegedly stabbing Mickey Joe Hill.

Lawrence County Sheriff Gene Mitchell said the 37-year-old Hill was in good condition at Huntsville Hospital after being stabbed at Dollar's rural Lawrence County home.

The sheriff said Thursday that Dollar had given Hill money to buy the beer, but Hill got the wrong kind.

Dollar was released from jail on $5,000 bail.

The last 10 pounds

2008-07-31T08:21:00.002-04:00

Dear Last 10 Pounds,

You may think you are special because we all know who you are. There are books about you and diets about you, blah blah blah. I just wanted to let you know that I, for one, am not a fan of yours. You make my clothes unflattering and I have even bought the dreaded next size up to accomodate you. I am no longer going to stand for the way you linger and have made yourself at home in my body. This is war.

It's over for you. I have made my peace and I'm saying goodbye. You are no longer welcome here.

Sincerely,

Melody A. Kingsley

Pet Names

2008-07-26T10:00:00.001-04:00

Maya has some toys that she recently named:

"Sushi" a toy fish
"Melinda Riding Hood" a toy bunny

Yoga for retired athletes

2008-07-19T14:44:00.003-04:00

I would like to have thought of myself as athletic. I loved sports and I was an avid runner. I even ran pretty regularly after having Maya. My best buddy from college, Tami, and I wanted to prove that 30 yrs old was not really old. We signed up for a half marathon and did pretty decently at it... um... we finished. I thought that was decent. My body fat percentage was nice and low and all my clothes fit almost as nicely as before I had babies. But alas, I was born with a malalignment (similar to cars) in my knees. I remember after that race my knees were swollen for about a week. I never seemed to get back into the "groove" of running after that. I think I did a 5K since then but that had to be about it.

I tried Pilates, but it kicked my butt. You never have to use those kinds of muscles as a runner! I recently started Yoga. I thought it would help me in many ways. It would be a gentle, relaxing way of getting back into shape.

If you are interested in a peaceful way of getting fit, try Kundalini Yoga. After 3 weeks, my body fat percentage is down 4%. I have only lost 3 pounds so far, but I'm trying not to focus on that as much as my body composition.

One thing that's really fun is that Maya can do this, too. We have a blast trying our new poses. Reili tried joining in today, but I think she was just trying to catch a free ride on the horsie (moms, you know what I'm talking about).

Have any of you tried Yoga? What is your favorite kind? I didn't realize how many types of Yoga were out there until I bought a Yoga magazine at the airport. Maybe I'll start my own type of Yoga!

Traveling and getting paid.

2008-07-19T02:04:00.004-04:00

One of the perks of my job is that I get to travel. This past week I got to go to Mesa, Arizona for work. I was excited because I got to go out there earlier in the year and I saw two friends of mine, Tessa and Kathy. Well, Tessa and Kathy were both out of town this time around, so I was completely on my own. I like to travel, but it so much better with someone or visiting someone.

I usually never get room service, but I did this time. I thought it would be boring and weird to eat out alone. It was fun because it was brought on a tray, so I could eat my dinner, watch TV, and lay in bed all at the same time. Ah, utter laziness.

I had to work, so not much time was spent lounging around, but I did get to hit the pool in 110 degree weather. After 30 minutes, I came back in. I had a nice tan. It was like a microwave on my skin.

Arizona is super cool. I love it. The part I didn't love was a 5 hour flight sitting next to some intoxicated folks, one who apparently had a lot of fiber earlier in the day, AND I had the aisle seat... did I mention this was a red eye flight? Yes, during prime sleeping time I was wide awake and uncomfortable. I should've upgraded. I've never sat in business class, but you can upgrade for $49 on AirTran. I think it would've been worth it. Have you flown first class? Was it worth it?

The Beauty Barn

2008-07-13T23:01:00.009-04:00

I try to stay on top of fashion, skin care and things of that nature. I want to look nice but I don't want to pay a high price. I figure if the word "Barn" is in the title, it must mean good deals are involved.

Here are a few tips to save a few bucks:
*Shop at thrift stores in more affluent areas of town. I have gotten many name-brand barely worn/new clothes at a nearby Goodwill.
*Look for your favorite skin care products online. I just received my Obagi products from Amazon for half the price.
*Instead of spending hundreds of dollars at the dentist, you can get teeth whitening products over the counter or even medical-grade ones on eBay.
*Read the ingredients of your skin care regimen and buy them at a drug store in it's "raw" form (i.e. Witch Hazel, Hydroquinone, etc.) Witch hazel (skin toner) is under $3 and Hydroquinone (freckle/sunspot lightener) is less than $7.
*Microdermabrasion interest you but you can't afford salon prices? Try Avon's ANEW Clincal advanced dermabrasion. Here's a link to my friend's Avon site. I love this stuff and it is under $23 right now!

Do you have any tips for the Beauty Barn? Have you found a great deal on fashion or beauty products?

Maya's Potty Mouth...again

2008-07-12T02:42:00.003-04:00

Maya: Mommy, you gotta kill that dadgum fly.
Me: That what?
Maya: Dadgum fly... you know, dadgum flies, dadgum moths, dadgum butterflies...

I think she picks these things up from Jeff's reformed sailor language.

Melody, You Got it Goin' On

2008-07-12T02:11:00.004-04:00

When I got married, I was utterly mortified if some guy hit on me. Of course, when I got married I lived on a Navy base and those guys generally didn't seem to care if I was married or not. I remember thinking, "Don't they realize I'm married?!?!" Then as I had been married for a while, I didn't think much about it if a guy hit on me. I guess it thought they were just being friendly or something of that nature.

I recently worked in Kentucky. Here is an exchange between me and an Indian fellow at a gas station.

Dude: "You live here?"
Me: "No, I'm from Ohio...just here for work."
Dude: "You move to Kentucky?"
Not sure if he was asking me a question, of if it was some weird request...
Me: "Uh, no, I don't think so."
Dude: "Why not move to Kentucky?"
Me: "No, I'm going to stay in Ohio for a while. I just moved there."
Dude: "You move to Kentucky? I am here."
I laughed, gathered my snacky snacks and said,
"Maybe next time." Not that that made any sense, but neither did he.

Maya's Wit

2008-07-05T01:26:00.002-04:00

My brother and Maya joke quite a bit with each other. Maya is almost 3 1/2 by the way. Here's a taste of the banter:

Maya: You stink, Uncle Shi.
Shi: No, you stink Maya.
Maya: No, you're just smelling yourself.

So, whatcha been doin'?

2008-07-05T00:42:00.003-04:00

Dear blog readers (yes, all two of you). I must apologize for my sporadic postings of late. I think my mind went AWOL and I may have found it, but I'm still debating that one.

So, if you wanna know what I/we have been up to, here are a few highlights:

* I recently lectured my neighbors' children on birds, zoonotic diseases and the need to bleach out their swimming pool (long story worth it's own post)
* I worked in Indianapolis and went to the home of the ButterBurger and survived.
* Maya found a piece of metal shaped similarly to a plug and decided to remove the plastic plug cover, insert the metal into the outlet, see sparks and trip a circuit in our home... all without dying.
* Maya has moved from rebellious to just plain sneaky.
* Reili says, "Da-da" each time I try teaching her the word "ma-ma"... I secretly wonder if she is throwing this word in my face
* I have almost accepted that I am no longer a runner and I must move on to yoga or Pilates or something less stressful on my knees. Being over 30 is not for wimps.
* I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.
* Jeff and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary. We ate delicious king crab legs at Jay's Seafood Restaurant in Dayton.
* Our cool friends moved to VA and we are sad that they and their adorable Glitter aren't here in OH anymore.
* Thanks to my marvelous-looking friend, Debbie, I started some Obagi products and I am currently watching my face peel off.
* I am working on being more structured as a mom. So far, I have shortened the bed time routine and made a box for all of Maya's shoes....baby steps.
* We are planning on making a trip to PA for a week this month for a long overdue vacation.

Whew.

Lessons I've Learned...

2008-06-13T08:35:00.003-04:00

Well, it has been a crazy few months. I moved up in my job and that reeked havoc on my home, my blog, and pretty much every aspect of my life. I have learned a hard lesson and that is that I should stay home more and focus more on my family.

I initially took a job outside of my home so that I could interact with others a little bit each week. I could have conversations with adults and I could get to know the locals in my new community.

I have learned that going to work so that I may have more sanity kind of backfired. I ended up dealing with others' neuroses and not dealing with my own! Every job I've had seems to have those that like to cause a commotion whether there be one or not. As I've gotten older I realize that I could change jobs, but the same "type" of person will still be there. I try to do my best and there will always be those that will try to bring me down. They aren't happy people on the inside. They relish in others' failures and are jealous of others' success.

I just want to scream out, "Focus on yourself and leave me out of it."

I think I will go back to dealing with my own crazy life and working a bit less.

Tagged by my high school bud, Evonne.

2008-06-07T22:21:00.006-04:00

My friend Jane asked if I was okay since I haven't posted in over a month. I am alive and well (at least physically but not so much on the mentally side). So, for an easy post, here is some more stuff about me...just in case you haven't had enough...

Thanks, Evonne for the tag!

Here's what you do:
Link to the person who tagged you,
Post the rules on your blog,
Answer the questions about yourself,
Tag five people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs,
Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment at their blog,
Let your tagger know when your entry is up.

What was I doing 10 years ago?
I was living in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. I was dating a guy named Ken, who was the kinda guy I swore I would never date... and he knew it. I was working in an Emergency Department in Birmingham, Alabama. I was also driving my first car, beloved Levar, a black Acura Integra.

Five snacks I enjoy:
1. Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Almonds
2. Sharon's Coconut Sorbet
3. Rosemary and Olive Oil Triscuts
4. Azuki (Japanese red bean)ice cream
5. Shrimp Flavored Chips

Five things on my to-do list today:
1. Pick up my new loveseat from Big Lots... yes, Big Lots. (I got the floor model for $130 off!)
2. Give the girls a bath.
3. Clean and organize the living room.
4. Catch up on friends' blogs and my blog.
5. Veg.

Things I would do if I were a billionaire:
1. Go to medical school.
2. Build an energy sustainable house in Yellow Springs, OH. (Maybe an entire village of them!)
3. Take my entire family to Japan to visit relatives.
4. Set up my family and good friends for life.
5. Go on a humanitarian mission for my church (with Jeff of course).

Five jobs I've had:
1. Huddle House waitress
2. Bookkeeper/Office Manager for a lumber brokerage firm.
3. Assistant to Dr. Palmer (and ER doc)
4. Cardiovascular Disease research assistant at a university.
5. Lead Consultant for a health and wellness screening company.

Five of my bad habits:
Hmm, can I narrow it down to five??

1. Wasting vast amounts of time on the internet!!
2. Almost always being late.
3. Reading about exercise and not doing it.
4. Ignoring dirty dishes.
5. Trying too hard to fix everyone's problems.

Five places I have lived:
1. Tokyo, Japan
2. Great Falls, Montana
3. Piedmont, Alabama
4. Marlboro, VT
5. Dayton, OH

Five people I want to get to know better (yes, this means you are tagged!)
1. Ilona D.
2. Jennifer K.
3. Jane S.
4. Laura H.K.
5. Fauna S.

Why am I still watching this?

2008-04-23T00:15:00.002-04:00

My brother found an odd yet mesmerizing TV show called "Yo Gabba Gabba"; Maya loves it. I can't stop watching it, even when Maya's not around. See for yourself.

Yellow Springs, Ohio

2008-04-16T23:58:00.008-04:00

In our quest to find the "ideal" place to live, I think I may have found it. Jeff mentioned in passing that there was an area that was about the same distance as we currently are from the AFB. He said it was called Yellow Springs. A light went off in my head because I religiously listen to WYSO, which is our local NPR station. This is not just any run of the mill NPR station, it is the coolest one I have yet to encounter. I could go on and on about it, but you can check it out for yourself and let me know what you think.

Not only does Yellow Spring host the best NPR station ever, but it has wonderful qualities such as:
-It is home of Antioch University
-It is very diverse and rich in culture even though it has less than 4,000 residents
-It was the last stop on the Underground Railroad
-It promotes small business and does not have a Wal-Mart!
-Dave Chappelle lives there.
-It reminds me of Vermont in so many ways (I went to college in Vermont)
-It is safe.
-It would be a wonderful place for our children to be raised.
-They have contra dancing.
-Is host to the Glen Helen Ecology Institute
-There are endless nature trails and places to camp.
-As my husband so wonderfully put it, "It is a small town because it decided to be one, not because it is one."

I will keep you posted on my new found Ohio Mecca. Will Yellow Springs be my next stop?

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live and why?

Recipe for Instant Weight Loss

2008-04-13T18:57:00.006-04:00

1. Snuggle, bounce, and play with sweet (but sick) baby.

2. Allow baby to vomit on you and your clothes.

3. Let virus marinade for 2 days.

4. Simmer at 101 degrees Farenheit.

5. Have abrupt onset of gastroenteritis.

6. Check scale.

Raccoon Hair?

2008-04-06T18:33:00.003-04:00

I went to the wonderful land of Sephora last night with friends Jennifer and Josephine. I went only intending to spend $20 but some how managed to "need" $40 worth of products. How many products for eyebrows can be in one store? Anyhoo, we were glancing over the beautiful array of brushes. One such brush was made of raccoon hair. Say huh? Yes, hair from a raccoon. I found this to be a bit of a step down from mink or even goat hair. I also thought I would research how they got the raccoon to cooperate with being shaved or plucked or whatever they do. Is it now "PC" or something to use a raccoon? Does PETA approve? Will the next step be squirrels? What do you think about this?

March Madness

2008-03-21T03:32:00.004-04:00

The month of March is almost over and I have barely had time to enjoy a thing about it. Things are starting to settle down a bit, so before this wonderful month ends, I would like to focus on myself a little more. You may be thinking, "Hey, Melody, please talk about yourself. You just don't do that enough and I must hear more!" (Yes, blogs are a bit egocentric, aren't they?)

First, I must explain this lovely photo. Jeff works for the Air Force and this "Moustache March" Jeff is pretty proud of this crazy fu man chu meets biker guy look he has going on. He is outdoing all the young guys around work because their mustaches aren't half as thick as this sucker. It's pretty impressive isn't it?

We had a lovely blizzard here in Ohio...on my birthday. I wanted to celebrate my birthday on the actual day, so we called up a local restaurant and they were open. We bundled up and headed out against the elements and enjoyed a fine meal at Bob Evans. We had a blast. Jeff was sweet and got the lovely practical gift that I had requested because comfort comes before anything else after you turn 30.

Reili started "crawling" (a.k.a. getting where she needs to go in whatever mode suits her). -See previous post. It seems this little girl is so full of energy! She gets super restless whenever we try strapping her down in one of the various seats we have for her. It is amazing how many baby items you can buy and how quickly they clutter one's living room.

I was able to make an overnight trip to Mobile, Alabama for work. I spent my last two years of high school in Mobile at a magnet school (we liked to refer to it as nerd school). It was fun being back there and I also got to sneak in some time with my friend, Laura.
She drove over from Pensacola, FL. We had such a fun time! I flew in to Mobile airport in the morning, worked from 2-6pm and then met up with Laura for dinner and a fun spend the night party. Yes, kids, spend the night parties never end. Isn't that cool? We had so much fun. It was good seeing her again.

And finally... my brother is going to move up to Ohio! We are so excited for this to happen. There wasn't much keeping him in Alabama (we never planned to live there very long when we got there 25 years ago). We are making a short jaunt down there at the end of the month to help move him up here. Maya LOVES her Uncle Shi. His name is not Shi, but that's what we nicknamed him. His middle name is Shigeru (pronounced 'shee-geh-rlu') and we shortened it and changed the pronunciation and some how came up with "Shi" (prounounced 'shy').

Whew! A crazy post for a crazy month.

Some Babies Crawl...

2008-03-17T17:36:00.004-04:00

Trick or Treat, Smell My Feet!

2008-03-08T02:24:00.004-05:00

Here is a fun story. I can't even begin to tell you how busy I was this week. My company did some work with health screenings at some factories in the Columbus area. Like most factories, there are three shifts. To catch all three shifts, we had to work from 4:30am-4:30pm. I traveled all over the state and barely had time to catch my breath.

One day I had to travel to the Cincinnati area. Since the work would begin so early in the morning and I worked late the day before, I thought it would be best to spend the night. I forgot to pack my socks. I only have so many pair of socks in my house and half of them must have been eaten by my dryer. So, I had to wear my socks two LONG days in a row. Yes, I know, that is too much information... but it gets better.

So, I am a little self conscious of the fact that I'm wearing dirty socks. I sit down to take blood pressures and I get a whiff of something. I asked my friend if she had some body spray and she did. I went to the bathroom, sprayed the shoe/sock area of my body, then returned to work.

I sat back down only to smell the perfume along with a bad odor. We started to get busy. I was sitting next to a co-worker and decided that if I put my feet under the table and far away from him, no one would be the wiser.

After a few hours of dealing with my stinky feet, I realize that this is out of control. I mean, I have some old socks on but please! I thought, that is a horrible smell. I turned over my shoe only to find dog doodie on the bottom. Whew! Only dog crap, good. It wasn't me.

I proceeded to excuse myself and go to the ladies room where I thoroughly cleaned my shoe. I came back to my station and voila, the smell was gone.

The Glenn Girls

2008-02-28T10:45:00.004-05:00

Like most young adults, I went through a time in my life where I completely focused on myself and no one else. For example, I would regularly go out dancing until the wee hours of the morning. I would travel all over the country (and occasionally out of the country) whenever I felt like it. I even worked three different jobs all at the same time while averaging 5 hours or less of sleep per night. I wasn't the most active church-goer, either. I didn't seem to have a lot of direction in my life at the time. My dad wasn't in great health (he had heart disease) and my whole family seemed to be struggling. I moved to Birmingham, AL and tried to make a fresh start there.

Somehow, a young lady named Becky Glenn became my visiting teacher. In my church, this meant it was her job, or duty even, to visit me once a month to share a spiritual message and to make sure that I had a friend to lean on. I ignored her at first... her calls, her attempts to visit me... but I eventually let her into my home and gradually into my life.

She was outspoken, matter-of-fact, and completely by the book...and I mean THE book. Becky was exactly what I needed in my life. She helped me to get my life in order. She had a strong testimony of her beliefs and I truly looked up to her. After a while, she decided to go on a mission for our church. I was devastated at the thought of her leaving for 18 months but I knew it was the right thing for her to do. After all, she was a missionary to me.

While Becky was gone, I became close to her sister, Kathy. Kathy was much like Becky in her views and beliefs. Kathy was also very strong willed but a lot less outspoken. She was exactly the kind of friend I needed in my life at the time. Actually, this entire family was pretty amazing. There were nine, yes NINE, girls in this family. There were no males except for their father. I hear they all shared one bathroom, too, if you can imagine that!!

I became very close to Becky, Kathy, and their younger sisters Amy, Jill, and Jodi. I think I became a foster adult child of the Glenns. I never met all the girls in the family because some had married and moved away...

Fast forward a few years.... I moved to a suburb of Dayton, Ohio. I felt like my church would be a hard adjustment for me. Moving and meeting new people tended to be a hard thing for me to do. I also came into our new ward very pregnant (8 months) and completely lost in so many ways. My first Sunday there I walked out into the hallway after our first meeting. I was going to take Maya to the nursery but I wasn't sure where it was. I must have had a confused look on my face. A kind stranger and a familiar voice said, "Do you need help finding something?" She proceeded to tell me where I needed to go. I didn't really pay attention to what she was saying. I just felt like I knew her. I interrupted her and said, "What is your maiden name?" She said, "Glenn". Sherry has since proved to be just as wonderful and amazing as the rest of the Glenn girls. The Lord must have known exactly what I needed in this new stage in my life....

How I Love Thee...

2008-02-27T00:08:00.002-05:00

Since being in a somewhat vegetative state lately due to various viruses floating around the Kingsley home, I have found myself more heavily relying on my dear husband, Jeff. I read a beautiful Valentine's Day post by my friend, Michelle, and it was a true inspiration.

Jeff and I met about six years ago by unconventional means. I met him at a time when I was trying to work on who I was - spiritually and emotionally. It seemed the minute I quit looking to find someone and tried harder to make myself more like the person I wanted to eventually be with, Jeff miraculously appeared in my life.

Let me tell you about my wonderful husband.

1. He is a doting father and inspirational example for our daughters.
2. He appreciates my Japanese culture and my Southern roots because he grew up in Alabama and lived in Japan. He even loves to eat sushi.
3. He takes care of me. I always tried to take care of everyone else and he's the only person I will let take care of me.
4. He has a beautiful smile and makes me laugh so hard I could pee my pants...did I say could?
5. He is devoted to the Lord, our church, and his family.
6. He is a hard worker at his profession as well as at home.
7. He is almost my complete opposite, which is exactly what I need.
8. He never minds changing diapers, feeding kids, or watching the girls so I can have a break.
9. He has is brilliant.
10. He is mine.

I love you, Jeff.

What the Flu?

2008-02-22T21:15:00.005-05:00

We recently got back from a wonderful visit to see the Schells in Rolla, Missouri. When we returned home, I felt a little nauseated. I decided I would go on to bed because I had to be up early to work the next morning. I felt cold and just couldn't seem to get warm. I woke up and was wide awake at 1:00 am the next morning. I piddled around for a while and began feeling progressively worse. I shivered, had major stomach crampage, and writhed around the bed trying desparately to get warm. My head hurt, my eyes hurt, my skin hurt... does any of this sound familiar to you? Well, to make a long and dreadful story short, I had a flu-like virus for about 48 hours. I had to miss work and send the girls to Tara's house so a responsible human being could watch them. Jeff felt fine and headed off to work. I slept and laid in bed all day. I don't think I ate much but I did have the energy to shower and go back to bed.

Jeff and the girls came home that afternoon. I gave them a nutritious dinner of "find whatever you can, I'm going back to bed". Poor children. Poor Jeff. I didn't give the girls baths. I warned Tara that they might be stinky. Then, Jeff started his shivering and downhill spiral.

The next day, both of us didn't even have the energy to take the girls somewhere they could be watched properly. I slept all day off and on. Reili slept beside me as long as I slept. Jeff kept Maya entertained with PBS kids until the cooking shows came on in the afternoon. I finally got up to see how everyone was doing. No Maya or Jeff. Where could they be?

Apparently Maya got into trouble and Jeff put her in "time out" in her bedroom. Since he didn't have the energy to monitor this ingenious method of discipline, he had to go to her room with her. He decided to wrap himself in a huge blanket, lay on Maya's bedroom floor, and close them both in the room. That would show her.

I found him wadded up in a lethargic pile against the door while Maya was playing quietly with her toys. Man, we should be voted as parents of the year. Would you vote for us?

May I have some dog food with an order of fries, please?

2008-02-07T13:48:00.001-05:00

My mom is visiting me from Alabama this week. I also have the entire week off from work. This has given me the opportunity to do things that have been lagging since Reili's birth...er... since my pregnancy with Reili.

I decided it was about time to wash all the Ohio snow/salt/dirt mess off my car. I took it to a car wash. While I was there I also cleaned out the inside of my car. I found a plethora of goodies under the seat, in Maya's car seat, and in the trunk. Here are a few of the gems:

Dog Food. We gave our dogs away in July.
Sand. We went to Laura's beach wedding in June.
A Banana Peel. I think I had one last week.
A Hairbow. I've been looking for that sucker since August.
A strangely preserved french fry. No comment.
Various sticky, gooey things along with crumbs of all sorts.

Goodbye for now

2008-02-02T15:41:00.000-05:00

The President of our church, Gordon B. Hinckley, has passed away. He was 97 years old. His funeral services were broadcast today on BYU TV. I joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints three months before he became President, 13 years ago. He meant a lot to me, as he did to millions of people all over the world.

Pres. Hinckley, you will be missed here on this earth. We'll see you on the other side.

The Comedian Turns Three

2008-02-02T11:25:00.000-05:00

Last year, when Maya turned two, we had a huge shin dig for her at Chuck E Cheese's. This year, since life is ten times as hectic, we will have 3/4 less people, but just as much fun. Did you catch that, math whizzes?

My mom flew up from Alabama just for Maya's birthday. (Can you tell she's the only grandchild?)

Please join me in wishing my little girl a Happy 3rd Birthday!!!

Tagged by the Warrior

2008-01-31T12:58:00.000-05:00

I was tagged by Jill. It makes for an easy post plus I don't have to think much.

Two names you go by - other than the one you were given:
1. Mommy
2. Sweet Pea

Two things you are wearing right now:
1. PJs- It's my day off
2. My $10 Timex I got on sale at Campmor.com

Two of your favorite things to do:
1. Read Blogs
2. Snuggle with the girls

Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. A GPS. I don't care what kind. I get lost whenever I follow Google Maps.
2. A Memory foam mattress topper. I got spoiled at Kathy's house.

Two favorite pets you have/had:
1. Missy- a cute boxer mix who was my first "child" :) - now owned by Debra's sweet mom.
2. Ginger- a sweet black and tan hound/ lab mix and my best childhood friend. We used to go hiking through the woods and I would get lost. I'd follow her to get out and get home!

Two things you did last night:
1. Talked Jeff's ear off.
2. Relaxed with the fam.

Two things you ate today:
1. Fiber One bar.
2. Banana.

Two people you last talked to:
1. Maya
2. Myself

Two things you will do tomorrow:
1. Work at a health fair in Greefield, OH.
2. Pick my mom up from the airport!! (Woo hoo!)

Two favorite holidays:
1. Christmas
2. 4th of July

Two favorite beverages:
1. Diet Dr. Pepper- Cherry Chocolate
2. Vitamin Water

My Little Comedian

2008-01-30T01:53:00.000-05:00

Maya has found that different things make people laugh. She doesn't always know why, but she knows how. We watched the movie "Robots". She heard them say, "What the heck?" She started repeating it and I soon corrected her. I said, "It's not good to say "heck" Maya." So now she says, "What the --" and leaves the end of the sentence blank. She said, "Mommy, people laugh when you say, 'What the--'. So, she repeats this phrase at various times around various folks. She always gets a laugh.

As you could see in the older posts, Maya uses the word "poop" a lot. She throws that word around to get laughs. She now replaces words in songs with "poop". For example, her latest ballad to Reili is "Twinkle, twinkle little poop!" She also has nicknamed Reili "Smoochy Poopy".

It is so hard not to laugh sometimes. I want to keep a straight face but I usually can't and only end up encouraging her. Maybe deep down I'm supporting her comedic talents, right?

My Random Thoughts

2008-01-30T01:23:00.000-05:00

Inspired by my friend, glittersmama, I thought I would share some of the random thoughts I've had of late...
1. Maya is still potty-tarded. I have now resorted to telling her that "When you turn three, you will get to wear underwear!" in hopes that she will somehow be convinced that one must stop wearing diapers on his/her third birthday.
2. I am no longer the youngest kid in the room. I now talk about my body in terms of changes in metabolism since I've turned 30 and the horrible effects of gravity.
3. I used to laugh at the amount of time/money/false hopes that my mom would put into various creams to get rid of wrinkles. I now own at least 2 eye creams and a various assortment of facial creams. Who am I fooling?
4. I can't do it all. Anyone who can, in my opinion, is weird or will die at a young age from exhaustion.
5. I would rather be in the nerdy club than the cool club. (Melinda, don't you agree?)

Working Mom

2008-01-20T04:11:00.000-05:00

I took a job to become a better mom. You don't hear those words a lot, do you? I think there are people that are meant to be full-time homemakers and I am not one of them.

I didn't work for about 6 months when I was pregnant and we were moving from Alabama to Ohio. I found myself sitting in my stretchy pants, eating lots of chocolate, and basically ignoring all the housework I had to do. I did spend lots of time with Maya (this was before Reili was born) and we had a lot of fun. I just think I got into a rut. I think the ultimate solution for me was to get a part-time job.

I need structure. Not structure created by me (which doesn't seem to exist) but structure created by someone else thus making me have to organize the rest of my life. This may only make sense to me, but there it is. I get more things done the busier I am.

Overall, I'm happier. I have a good balance of work and home. I also get to interact with adults on a regular basis. This makes me feel like my IQ isn't dropping by the second.

More Maya...

2008-01-06T15:43:00.000-05:00

Maya: Mommy, what are you doing?
Me: I'm smelling Reili. I love how she smells.
Maya: What does Reili smell like?
Me:...like milk...and baby lotion...
Maya: What do I smell like?
...like apple juice...and hot dogs??
Me: Yes, Maya, exactly.

Maya's Joke #3

2008-01-04T15:15:00.000-05:00

Maya: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNO...poop!

You get it? Poop instead of "P"? I thought that was a funny joke!

Mayaisms

2008-01-04T15:10:00.000-05:00

We were praying and it was Maya's turn. I asked her to repeat after me.

Me: Dear Heavenly Father...
Maya: Dear Heavenly Father

Me: Please bless this food...
Maya: Please bless this food

Me: To nourish and strengthen...
Maya: To nourish and spank them

Merry Christmas!

2007-12-20T09:21:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends and Family,

As you may know, this has been quite a busy year for us. We started 2007 with Melody pregnant and Maya turning two. Jeff began his final semester at the University of Alabama at Birmingham. We also began to pack up everything in hopes to move to Ohio in the summer.

Melody went with her friend, Fauna, to Arizona in the Spring to see their friends, Petra, Tessa, and Kathy. She then went to Chicago to meet up with friends from Birmingham, Cortney, Jane, Katie, and Angie.

Jeff graduated with honors in May with a Bachelor of Science in Materials Engineering. Melody (finally) received her degree with honors with a Bachelor of Science in Health Science.

We sold our house in Vestavia Hills and began our hunt for one near Dayton, OH. We decided to stay with Mom Kingsley in Lexington, KY while we searched. Because of all the heavy moving, Melody began labor a tad too early and had to go to the hospital and be put on temporary bed rest. She recovered after a couple of weeks of rest and the baby stayed put!

Jeff was able to join the Boy Scouts, from our home church in Birmingham, to attend a High Adventure Camp in the Florida Keys! He was able to travel out to sea (during a tropical storm) and use his scouting skills as well. He loved being with the scouts and miss them terribly.

Melody also did some traveling to Florida to see her friend, Laura, marry Lance King. Because of the bedrest, she missed her dear friend Debra's wedding in Alabama to (her former high school sweetheart) Bill Whittaker. When Melody was feeling better, she also went to Vermont with her best friend, friend Tami, to see their college friend Rachel, get married to her longtime boyfriend (10 years!!) Jonathan Taylor. Lots of traveling and lots of weddings!!

After all the traveling was over, we all moved to Medway, Ohio (near Dayton) to be close to Jeff's new position as an engineer with the US Government. He loves his job and couldn't have dreamed of anything more. We had to give away our dogs, Missy and Koda, but they are both in great hands. We miss them so much.

Maya has blossomed this year. She knows so much and we are so proud of her. (See previous posts for wonderful stories!) She was most excited when she received her baby, Reili. Reili was born by c-section on August 14th at 11:24am. She was 7 pounds 10 ounces and 19 inches long.

Right after Reili's birth, Jeff injured his knee by tearing his ACL and Meniscus! He underwent knee surgery a few weeks later. He is recovering well. (We feel like we are getting old because we are mentioning our ailments in this letter.)

Melody began working for two health and wellness companies as a per diem wellness consultant. She usually works a couple of days a week and loves working in the healthcare field.

Jeff and Melody are both going to begin working on their Master's degrees in the Spring. Jeff will pursue a Master of Materials Engineering and Melody will pursue a Master of Public Health. Maya will pursue a pre-school education (hopefully) and Reili will pursue bigger things such as learning to crawl and sit up.

We hope you are enjoying this glorious holiday season. We love our Savior, Jesus Christ, and hope you enjoy celebrating his birth this Christmas Day. God bless!

Jeff, Melody, Maya, and Reili Kingsley

Earning her keep.

2007-12-19T23:12:00.001-05:00

Signs I'm Getting Older

2007-12-19T09:31:00.000-05:00

I recently went on a trip for work to Kentucky and Indiana. On the way, I realized that I am not the youngest person in the room anymore. It is a tough transition from being young and vibrant to being the woman who talks about breast milk and diapers.

I got in the car, which was pre-warmed so I wouldn't be cold, and cranked up my music... which for once was not the Wiggles. In my pensive face (see previous post), I began to think about the following things:

1. The loud music was too loud thus I progressively turned it down throughout my drive.
2. The loud "music" was NPR and John Mayer.
3. I had the car completely packed the night before so I wouldn't forget anything in my sleepy stupor.
4. The seat heater in my car not only warms me, but comforts my achy muscles.
5. 5 miles over the speed limit would get me there fast enough. No need to raise my insurance premiums by getting a ticket!
6. Sensible shoes are underrated.

Pensive Maya

2007-12-18T14:03:00.000-05:00

"You're looking very pensive."
"No, I'm just thinking." -The Thiedemans

Sugar Hangover

2007-12-17T10:50:00.000-05:00

I don't feel so good. Yesterday was a yucky, icy, snowy day. We stayed inside all day and made it a nice family day. I suggested to Jeff that I wanted to make cookies. He put in a request for sugar cookies with frosting. I like cookies but not super sweet cookies. We made a batch of sugar cookies and I got a recipe for frosting that called for 4 cups of confectioner's sugar. I ate a few cookies and think I may have OD'ed on sugar. I have a headache and feel lethargic. Maybe I can rinse out my system with a lot of water. Don't you just love the holidays?

Jeff vs. Netflix... Who would win??

2007-12-15T05:35:00.000-05:00

My dad was a happy go lucky, laid back, easy going kind of guy. His nickname was "Smiley" because he always seemed to have a big smile on his face. He served in the Air Force for 20 years and never made it to a high rank because he was pretty content where he was. I would have to say he was an Omega Male. This terminology doesn't really exist, but there you have it.

They say that girls want to marry a man like their father. I guess I'm the exception to that rule. I think I wanted to marry the opposite of my dad. My husband is extremely competitive. He will compete with me at any game (even though he's the only one competing). He works hard day in and day out. He is always at the top of his class, was close to my dad's rank when he left the Navy after only 4 years, and excels and anything he does. He is the alpha male... he is not an alpha male... he is the alpha male.

We decided to get Netflix. Netflix is a fun way of renting movies because you choose a plan where you can have x amount of movies at a time and you are able to watch the movies when you want and return them when you want. Jeff decided to do the math. He's an engineer, so everything we do somehow merits the need for him to pull out his massive graphing calculator. Anyhoo, he figured that if we watched the movie the day we got it and put it in the mail the next day, it would only cost blah blah amount per movie if we got the blah blah amount per month plan. "Sure," I said, "that plan sounds good to me." So that's what we did.

To give you a little insight into my life, you must read previous posts. Not that anyone I know has an easygoing stress-free life, but I just want to say that I barely have time to shower, much less watch a movie. No, seriously, I don't have time to shower.

Now, if I get a movie that Jeff doesn't want to watch with me...which happens on a regular basis, then Jeff will attempt to schedule my movie(s) arriving when he is on a business trip. I say attempt because that would entail me watching the movies when I receive them and returning them the next day. I, in my non-competitive nature, do not care to beat the Netflix 'system'. I watch movies when I have time. I got Netflix because of the luxury of not having late fees, watching them at my leisure, etc.

If I do not watch the movie that I want to see in what Jeff deems sufficient time, my movie (unwatched, mind you) will go back into the mail. This is the kind of thing that helps my husband have peace of mind. This is the kind of thing that stresses me out.

To all those who love math, engineering, or even have a competitive nature, can you please tell me if this makes sense?

B.O.

2007-12-15T04:48:00.000-05:00

I have been working hard as a biometric screener/health educator/wellness consultant. There is really no official title for what I do, I just do it, enjoy it and get paid for it. I decided to work a bit extra this week because I will be off for the next three weeks. I work at different companies checking on the employees' health to kind of give them an idea of where they are physically. We check blood pressures, cholesterol, body fat, bone density, and things of that sort. Since most people take time off for the holidays, these companies don't usually schedule health screenings during those times. It is good for me because I get three weeks off without having to request it. It is bad for me because I don't get paid. I had the bright idea of working extra to make up for that time.... so, back to the fun title of this post....

I have worked every day this week. You may think that is no big deal, but for a mom of an infant and an almost 3 yr old, it is VERY hard. I have also only been working 1-3 days a week for roughly 4 hours at a time. This week I was working long days, driving all over Ohio and waking up WAY before the sun. Somewhere around Wednesday night I started falling apart. I was completely exhausted and wanted to go to bed at 7:30pm. Needless to say, this never happened. I got up the next morning and was so tired. I was still pretty clean, I thought, so I slept a little more and skipped the shower. We have all done this, but it CAN backfire.

In my sleepy stupor, I forgot to put on deodorant. I went to work at a corporate site. I thought all was good but I occasionally smelled some B.O. Odd, I thought. These people bathe regularly (I often work at places where people only bathe on occasion). I went on with my day and got home only to realize that it was me. What? Just one day of skipping a shower? How could I be that stinky? Ah, I forgot to put on my deodorant. This is key on a skip shower day. I hope I didn't offend anyone or gross anyone out.

Once again, I was completely exhausted when I got home. I worked all day, drove all over and just wanted to go to bed. I did not make dinner, but somehow we all ate something. I skipped Maya's bath. She seemed to still be good... it is winter, you know? (This is all part of the rationalization that comes with being tired) So, I didn't bathe, Maya didn't bathe and we would all get to bed at a reasonable hour. Then Jeff, who is strangely obsessed with 'beating the system' of Netflix (story to come soon), wanted to watch a DVD on his laptop in our bed when I wanted to go to sleep. Mind you, it was only 7:30pm. I asked him to please put on some headphones and I would go to sleep. I didn't. I watched it.

The next morning I needed to be in a city 1 hour 15 minutes away at 6am. If I got up around 4am, I could leave in time. My alarm went off and Reili wanted to be fed. I fed her...in my bed...while I was laying down. I woke up again and it was 5am. I had to leave because the event started at 6:30am. I had no time to eat, shower, or do much of anything. Why oh why did I skip my shower yesterday?????

I changed my undies (VERY important) slapped on Jeff's man deodorant (serious stuff), sprayed myself down with body spray, brushed my teeth, changed and ran out the door. I cleaned my face with a baby wipe, brushed my hair and put on makeup in the car and made it to my job just as the health screening was beginning. We are encouraged to be there one hour before the event. I was there 2 minutes after it had begun. Wow.

I would like to take this time to relay an important message:
1. Never skip a shower simply because you are tired...it could and will probably backfire.
2. If you are over 30, go to bed when you are tired. You aren't a spring chicken. Accept it.

More about small town life...

2007-11-26T11:13:00.000-05:00

Growing up in Piedmont was funny... at least now when I look back at it. I often felt as though I was in The Twilight Zone and the only other person who felt as out of place as me was my brother. Here are some of the (now) funny questions I was often asked by others from Piedmont.

"What are you?" (translation: what is your ethnic background? I found it amusing to say "human" when asked that question)
"Where are you from?" (translation: you can't be from Piedmont because you don't have an accent and you don't look like you are black or white.)
"You're going to college in Vermont? What state is that in?" (No comment.)
"Is your dad Japanese?" (believe it or not, I was asked that question a lot b/c my dad had black hair, but is Caucasian and my mom had white/blondish hair and she is Japanese but albino)
"I heard that you eat dog." (Common misconception about Japanese, but it is not true. Plus people didn't realize that everybody in Asia isn't related.)
"Aren't you that girl that goes to that smart school?" (I moved from Piedmont at 16 to go to a math & science magnet school in Mobile, AL. People knew me from this fact only, it seemed.)

It is sad, yet funny. Most of my friends who left Piedmont after high school talk about our town as if it was a prison sentence and we escaped.

The Piedmont Journal

2007-11-24T15:17:00.002-05:00

Living in a small town can sometimes make life a little difficult. For one thing, there is no anonymity; everyone knows all your business and the business of your parents, grandparents, and so on. I didn't like that too much when I lived in Piedmont, AL. Now that I have moved from there, I have found humor in that small town life. When I go to my mom's house, I immediately have to catch up on all the great news from the weekly "Piedmont Journal." The Journal has improved in the past years, but there are still remnants of the old journal left now and then.

For example, it is commonplace to see things such as: "Lordy! Lordy! Linda is 40!" or an article about how the Wolf family took an Alaskan cruise during the summer, or a little too much detail written into the Obituaries, Wedding Announcements, and children's birthdays. My favorite article to date goes a little something like this (names and details have been changed to protect the innocent):

"Jerome Johnson Came to Visit Piedmont Here Lately"
After moving from Piedmont 25 years ago, Mr. Jerome Johnson decided it was time to come home for a visit. Mr. Johnson has been living in Tennessee since 1983. His family and about 15 of his old friends met up at Hardee's for coffee Sunday morning. Mr. Johnson stayed in town for a week or so and then went back to his new home in Tennessee.

The Summer Olympics

2007-11-21T18:37:00.000-05:00

I'm from this small town in northeast Alabama called Piedmont. I say I'm from this town because I lived there from the age of 6 to 16. I kind of loathed the town, the people, the accent, and almost every aspect of living there. Now, when I return for a visit, like a bad relationship, I only seem to remember all of the good things about living there. I remember my neighborhood where all the boys (and me) would have our own version of the Summer Olympics. Rob was in charge. He was always in charge of the neighborhood sports. He was the coolest guy in the world. He taught me how to play basketball, tag football, Whiffle ball, and he even had a golf cart he would drive around the block like any other cool kid would. We would all line up waiting for him to pick us to ride with him on that awesome cruise.

Rob mapped out the paths we would take for the cycling event. I had a pretty bike with huge handle bars with red fringes hanging from them. My brother Clarence, Curtis, and Rob had BMX bikes. I could barely keep up. For the medals, we used discarded beer cans we found in a nearby field (this is the kind of redneck town I grew up in) and used the different colors- Gold (Michelobe) and Silver (Bud Light)and Bronze (Coors, I think) to represent each prize. Since I was the tag-a-long little sister, I was almost always in 4th place. Rob was kind enough to let me have my own prize for 4th place because he was super cool like that. He looked around our carport and found a wet sponge and that became our last medal.

One race will always stick with me in my fond memory. I remember we all took off on our bikes down the street. Rob was in first place, as usual, and Clarence and Curtis were neck and neck until they reached the curve at the end of the street. Like the Talladega 500, there was a nasty wreck at this sharp turn and the two became tangled up in BMX bikes. I remember peddling so hard to catch up...and then...like my dreams.. I was able to pass my brother and Curtis as they tried so desperately to pick themselves up. Rob was waiting at the finish line and, for the first time, I got that silver medal. What a momentous occasion. I got the Bud Light can! It meant so much to me. When I see Rob now, we still joke about that wet sponge. I remind him that I didn't get it every time.

Answers to "Guess Who?"

2007-11-21T18:36:00.000-05:00

A. Maya
B. Reili
C. Maya
D. Maya

The Latest...

2007-11-21T02:02:00.000-05:00

I have been working quite a bit since I came back from Alabama. Man, working outside of the home is harder in a sense but easier in another. I guess the whole "sticking to a schedule" thing is hard for me in my day to day life but much easier for me when I'm getting paid for it. I am extremely neat, organized, and can keep a chipper appearance at work but pretty much none of that at home. Now, if I could just figure out a way of getting paid at home.

I work at health screenings checking blood pressures, cholesterol, body fat/BMI, and other fun stuff. It is interesting to see what kind of shape an average American is in. Most people are doing well with their blood pressure, but not so well in pretty much every other area. We live a very sedentary life style. It is such a contrast to my relatives in Japan. I remember visiting my family a few years ago and riding down one of those huge alpine slides with my aunt who was then in her mid 50s. She laughed so hard and had a lot of fun with me. We would hike up this huge mountain, ride down the slide and do it over and over again. Japanese women view this time in their lives as a bit of a second youth/childhood except this time around, they have money, time and no kids at home. They take care of their bodies, eat healthily, and try their best to look great, too.

I'm working on the whole early to bed early to rise bit this week and next. Most of my jobs begin around 5-7am and I usually travel one or more hours to get to the event site. I like the early mornings. My house is quiet and I don't have to beat any morning traffic. I've been going to bed right after I put Maya to bed lately. Does this mean I'm getting old? Next thing you know I will be eating the early bird special dinner at 4pm with all the other old people.

Tagged by Mikelle

2007-11-11T20:57:00.000-05:00

My friend Mikelle tagged me for this little game so I thought I would give it a try.
Here’s the rules:
A. Each player lists 6 facts/habits about themselves.
B. At the end of the post, the player then tags 6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog, for these rules.

1. I sucked my thumb until I was in kindergarten. Yes, I had to wear braces to fix the damage.
2. I have dated 5 guys named Jason: Jason Crook, Jason Bass, Jason Smith, Jason Ryder, Jason Tanner and now I live on a street called Jason Drive. Yes, weird, I know.
3. I'm liberal to a Mormon but conservative to a liberal. I listed my political views as moderate because I don't know what else I am.
4. I'm strangely obsessed with celebrity gossip (tmz.com is my fave) and I go to the library to 'relax' by reading magazines (not books!)
5. I marched in the Million Dollar Band as a mellophone player. Not that exciting unless you are a Bama fan or a band nerd.
6. I met my husband on www.ldssingles.com, an internet site for single Mormons. I wanted to meet/date/marry a guy that was a member of my church, had an appreciation for Japanese culture, and would live in Alabama (at least at the time). Jeff was stationed in Japan with the Navy, was LDS (Latter-day Saints), served his mission with one of my best friends (character reference), and grew up in Alabama. Ah, fate...it even works with online dating.

So now I tag Kim, Jamie, Glittersmama, Fauna, and Michelle.

I'm going home, ya'll!

2007-10-31T09:56:00.002-04:00

I'm packing and cleaning and getting the girls ready for a trip to my hometown, Piedmont, Alabama. Jeff is away on business to southern Cal for two weeks. He actually served a mission for our church in Anaheim, California. He is hoping to see some of his old friends while he is out there. Life is tough without him here, that is for sure. I'm excited about going to see my mom and brother. This is his first time to meet Reili and of course, Maya is his pride and joy and he can't wait to see her. I'm also trying to meet up with my dear friends there, too. I never thought I'd say this, but I miss Alabama. I miss good BBQ, southern hospitality, and knowing where everything is. I'll see ya'll next week!

2007-10-31T09:56:00.001-04:00

Maya

2007-10-30T14:18:00.000-04:00

The "Arthur" Theme Song

2007-10-30T06:50:00.000-04:00

Maya loves the show, "Arthur," which airs on PBS. This is her version of the theme song. Here are the actual words (as sung by Ziggy Marley):

Every day when you're
Walking down the street,
Everybody that you meet
Has an original point of view.
And I say - Hey! (Hey!)
What a wonderful kind of day
If we could learn to work and play
And get along with each other.

Maya's Version:
And I say - Hey! (Hey!)
What a wonderful bind a hay
If we could learn to work and play
And get a piece a bear.

"There will be sleeping enough in the grave." ~Benjamin Franklin

2007-10-28T19:09:00.000-04:00

I don't sleep much. Sleep is overrated. I'm up early(ish) when Maya wakes up and I go to bed somewhere between midnight and 2am so that I can have some "me" time before the noisy day begins again. I used to nap when she (Maya, child #1, napped). That's what all the books say. Nap when they nap, yeah right. I napped with her often, even to the end of my pregnancy with Reili (child #2). Then, without warning, Maya STOPPED taking naps! Any pregnant woman could tell you that naps are ESSENTIAL. My nights consisted of waking up every 1-2 hours to either pee, blow my nose, or eat/drink something. I was usually so extremely exhausted during the day but could no longer get a nap with Maya. So, I thought I had beat the system by placing Maya in her front of a good DVD (I know, I know, I'm a bad mom) and sneaking off in order to get a little nap during the day. I was SO pregnant, SO large and uncomfortable, that the only place I could get some good sleep was in my bed with my body pillow.

The first time I did this trick, Maya would come and get me whenever she needed something. I thought, "What a responsible two year old" and thus I tried it again a few days later. I would say, "Come and get me if you need anything." I fell asleep and was even a little bit relaxed knowing that my sweet, responsible little girl would awaken me if anything terrible should happen. Well, the sneaky evil spirit-demon that possesses my child on occasion decided to pay a visit that day. Maya found a black permanent marker, decided to paint her toenails and a little bit on her legs, face, arms, and some clothes. She also decided that she wanted to shave like Daddy did. She got the razor (from the bathroom in the room where I was sleeping, and cut her lip while trying to shave her "mustache." I never took a nap again.

So, fast forward a few months. Maya is now 2 1/2. Reili is 9 weeks old. I get about 4-6 hours of extremely interrupted sleep at night and no naps....ever. Today I was exhausted as usual. Jeff had just left for a business trip for a couple of weeks. I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. Maya was being pleasant and playing quietly. I took Reili in my bed to feed her and while Maya sat on the bed and played. I started dozing off and Maya kept playing. She likes to talk to me when I'm sleeping. I would incoherently respond to her and then drift off again. She got a picture by the bed and took it out of the frame. I glanced over and saw her holding some glass. I took it from her and tucked it under my pillow. "Dangerous," I thought. "Glad I caught that one in time." I dozed off again. Next thing I know, Maya is shaking something out all over the bed. I don't think much about it and fall asleep again. I wake up a couple of minutes later when I realize what is going on. Maya had gotten a bag of BBs from Jeff's nightstand. (He got a BB gun when he went with our church's scouts to their high adventure camp this summer and for who knows why had a bag of BBs, opened of course, in his nightstand.) Maya said, "Mommy, I swallowed one."

I let my little girl play with small plastic objects which she managed to strew across the bed AND swallow one of. What was I thinking? Was I really thinking I could get a nap even after the permanent marker/razor incident??? Hmm... I like to think of myself as a good mom at times, but this was not one of them. I let my guard down. NEVER let your guard down. Sleep is overrated. There will be sleeping enough in the grave.

Guess Who?

2007-10-27T01:25:00.000-04:00

Children in the same family often look alike. I find it interesting how much these two actually do.

Is it Maya or Reili? You decide. (answers coming soon)

A.

B.

C.

D.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

2007-10-27T00:53:00.000-04:00

I was taking Maya to the babysitters today so I could get some training done for work. She obviously was having some anxiety about going. The conversation went a little like this:

Maya: Mommy, my tummy hurts.
Me: It does? What's wrong?
Maya: Mommy, I have a fever.
Me: (starting to fall for it) You have a fever? Your tummy hurts?
(in realization) Wait, Maya, what is a fever?
Maya: (trying to use some mind trickery) Mommy, I have a fever in my tummy.
Me: Maya, I don't think you are really sick.
Maya: *Chuckles*

The Body of a Mom

2007-10-26T23:52:00.000-04:00

When is it that we are finally what we strive to be? I wannabe healthy, fit, patient, wise, wealthy, righteous, and so on. I constantly read self help books in order to help myself, but I actually feel kind of lazy reading and not doing. Do you know what I mean?

Right now, I want to lose weight and get in shape. I start out each morning eating really healthy... maybe too healthy. Around lunch time, I get REALLY hungry. I mean breast feeding mommy hungry. I eat what I make and then whatever Maya doesn't eat. So, there goes the diet for the day. The answer to losing weight is a combination of eating healthy and exercising. We all know this but few of us actually do it well. I feel that I am eating healthy but when 4 servings turn into one, it doesn't really count now does it?

I really did exercise for a few weeks there... ugh, this is so tough. "I'll start Monday, " I often think to myself. I kind of wish I had been extremely obese so that I would have a rack full of stretchy pants to fit into right now. I do fit in my old clothes now, but it's not a pretty sight. I fit in my pants only after doing squats for half an hour and fit in my shirts after stretching out the booby part.

Ah, motherhood. It's worth the stretch marks, nursing boobs, tormented self image... it is all worth it, I promise.

Blogoholic

2007-10-25T23:39:00.000-04:00

Somewhere around the time I got married, I quit trying to keep up with what was cool. Around the time I had Maya, I was very uncool and in addition to my uncoolness, I also had no idea what was going on in the world. I didn't know what bands were "in" or "out", I wasn't quite sure how to use MySpace, and I still don't use text messaging on my phone. Now, years after its inception, I have finally learned how to blog.

One would think blogging was very simple. You write about your life and blah blah blah...it is basically an online journal. Well, it is nice to write about your life, but it isn't nice that only two of your friends actually reads what you write. In my case, one of the two is my own husband and the other one is me.

Ah, but, much like Ego Surfing (a.k.a. "Googling" one's own name), the blog does give a little boost to the old self image. You find out that some of your friends have blogs and they put a link to you on their blog. That brings my total up to five. You get comments on occasion and then you begin to feel like maybe you are writing to an actual audience. You write more often, check your counter a couple of times a day (or a dozen) and tweak your blog incessantly.

Now, I'm reading other blogs...getting ideas...learning what not to do... finding blog 'groups'...learning things about others before I actually meet them in person (a.k.a. stalking)... and I find myself wasting hours at a time on blogs...that link to other blogs...that link to... What? It's already 3 am? I don't have a problem. I promise, it's totally under control. I can quit blogging at any time...cold turkey.

To Work or Not to Work...

2007-10-25T12:52:00.000-04:00

I've been working part-time lately. I haven't worked regularly since February. I didn't mind not working because I was pregnant and sick and tired and all that lovely jazz that comes with it. I never viewed myself as one who would stay at home with her kids full-time. I totally respect all the parents who can do that, but I often wonder if I have the personality/endurance to do so. I also never viewed myself as someone who had her children in full-time day care. The solution, I think, is to work part-time. If I work part-time, I have a little extra money and a lot more sanity. I have read a few books about money and how to save it, etc. One of my favorite books is The Tightwad Gazette by Amy Dacyczyn.

In her life transforming book, she discusses the matter of working outside the home. She look at how much a mother actually "makes" when she works at a job. There is the cost of gas, car maintenance, convenience foods, childcare, clothing, etc. When you look at it that way, which most Americans don't, it is not very profitable to work out side the home.... well, financially at least.

My need to feel smart is overwhelming at the moment. My IQ has been dropping (see 'Fart Express' blog entry) as each day passes. Talking, interacting, and working with other adults helps me stay sane. As you could probably tell from my previous posts, I am not very sane of late. I may only make about 15 cents an hour working, but it does seem like an extremely well paid 15 cents.

All Aboard the Fart Express! (patent pending)

2007-10-23T08:14:00.000-04:00

All moms have struggled with their baby having gas, colic, indigestion... you name it. Now, we have put an end to the old techniques: the old pump and putter, the manual cheese squeeze, and various colic remedies.

Introducing the Fart Express tm.

1) Just place your baby into the seat with feet elevated.
2) Turn on swing.
3) Listen to the thunder clap!

The baby's position along with the centrifugal force expels the gas at light speed!

Your baby will soon stop crying, feel relief, and fall fast asleep!

Something Wicked This Way Comes

2007-10-21T22:26:00.000-04:00

Is this girl gorgeous or what? Sometimes, when she is asleep, I look at her and admire her utter radiance. How did I help create such a wondrous being? I think those thoughts are fleeting when she is awake.

I have lately felt that she is a bit of an energy vampire, sucking me dry of what little caffeine-infused life I have left. I love her dearly and often reminisce of the days when I viewed her as an angel sent from Heaven. I thought she could do no wrong and everyone else's child couldn't even compare (no offense to my dear friends). But those days of self righteousness are long gone. I have been truly humbled. Maybe it is a lesson that the Lord wanted me to learn. Apparently He feels I haven't learned it well enough yet.

Today, as Jeff had to physically remove her from our church meeting so that others could hear the speaker and not Maya's screaming, I realized that she is only two and this too shall pass. I then looked down at my angelic two month old and said a little prayer to Heavenly Father. I mentioned to him that I think I got it...you know...the life lesson he is trying to teach me...I just pray I don't have to learn it twice.

Missing in Action

2007-10-21T00:14:00.000-04:00

You may be wondering if I've gone MIA. I haven't posted in a while and as you could probably tell from the last few posts, I've had my hands full with a baby, a terrible 2 yr old, and an injured hubby. Today, like many other days, I felt like I lost my mind. My mind has been disintegrating ever since I became pregnant with Maya. I began to forget things, misplace things, and call people by the wrong name. When Maya was born, my IQ was lowered by reading baby books instead of intriguing non-fiction, watching Baby Einstein (though informative for children, it may actually make adults less intelligent), and singing the ABCs instead of Baroque chamber music. Now that Reili is here, I have found myself feeding her in the middle of the night while at the same time being summoned by Maya to her room because she had a nightmare. Nighttime is supposed to be a time to rest, recuperate, and maybe even sleep. Nighttime for me is just like the day, but darker.

Today, Jeff went to watch the Alabama football game at a friend's house. He took Maya and I took Reili. Reili and I went to the library and had plans to do the grocery shopping, too. On the way to the library, she began to cry. I'm driving Jeff's stick shift, so comforting Reili was quite a feat. I think I stuck a bottle in front of her face and stuffed a blanket under it in hopes that she would be able to eat and stop crying. We got the library and she didn't stop. I returned everything at the front desk, rushed to get some DVDs and books for Maya, and came right back to checkout. Yes, all the DVDs started with the letter D and the books were all by the same author, but I did get some things for her. The librarian looked at my checkout stack and said, "Wow, that was quick!" I realized I had to throw my pickiness out the window when I have a baby in tow.

We got out to the car and Reili continued to cry. We were stuck on the highway as one lane was closed because they were repaving the road. Instead of making it to the grocery store or joining Jeff to watch the game, I headed home in stressed out and in tears. I fed Reili (not from seemingly well positioned bottle), she seemed content, and we both took a nice nap. When Jeff got home, I vented, cried some more and then listened to Jeff make a phone call. He called my friend, Glittersmama, and asked her to help his struggling wife. She and I made plans to go out later and eat something with chocolate in it.

She was busy with something until later on in the evening and so I was able to venture to the evil Wal-Mart and do my grocery shopping in peace. In my mind, Wal-Mart has always seemed like a dark cloud . It kills small businesses, it attracts WTs (as my friend Petra so politely acronymed them), and it is ALWAYS crowded. Now, whenever I need to go to get groceries, Jeff watches the girls and I spend about two hours there. It is freedom. I walk around the store oblivious to the evils around me. I find myself alone...independent...doing my shopping... no one calling me...no one needing me. I now sadly equate Wal-Mart with peace. Wal-Mart is my happy place. I know if there were a Super Target here, I would be even happier....but it is all kinda sad any way you look at it.

I came home happy and relieved and all I needed now was some girl time with Glittersmama and some chocolate to go with. She is super cool. She is a mom, too, and understood me and listened to me. She even ate chocolate with me. All in all, it was a good day.

Halloween

2007-10-12T06:57:00.001-04:00

Mom Jeans

2007-10-09T11:34:00.000-04:00

Laura asked what "Mom Jeans" are...

...and Here is the infamous SNL clip:
Mom Jeans

Potty Advice

2007-10-07T18:54:00.000-04:00

Maya seems to be getting past this "evil" phase and now I feel the need to focus on potty training. No pre-school around here will take the kid until she is potty trained. What is that about? Doesn't it matter that she knows how to count to 10 and say her ABCs? Just because she's potty-tarded doesn't mean she shouldn't make the cut.

So, does anyone have any nifty tricks, ideas, methods for potty training???

Maya's Joke #2

2007-10-05T23:22:00.000-04:00

Maya: Knock. Knock.
Me: Who's there?
Maya: Banana.
Me: Banana who?
Maya: Banana hunk.

Eh, she needs a little work on her comedy routine.

Two Grown Men

2007-10-05T11:16:00.001-04:00

I often hear Jeff tell me that I need to take some time for myself. I decided to finally go and get a haircut after delaying it for many months. Jeff's father was visiting for a few days and I thought it would be a good time to set up my hair appointment. Jeff's dad went to pick up Jeff from work (Jeff is still recovering from his knee surgery). He took Maya with him so I could have a little bit of free time. It was about lunchtime and Maya wasn't hungry because she had a late breakfast. I sent Maya and her diaper bag with Grandpa to go get Jeff. When the three of them came home, I told them that Maya needed to eat lunch. Jeff's dad asked how he could help. I asked if he could make a sandwich for Maya and he said yes. I left Maya and Reili with them while I went to get my haircut. My appointment wasn't very long but I had to run a couple of errands before returning home. I finally got home about 5pm. When I walked in the door, Maya said, "Mommy, I peed in my diaper. I peed in my pants." I said, "Okay, let's change your diaper." I walked over and got a diaper and asked Maya to lay down. She said, "Mommy, I peed in my pants." I looked at her pants and they were wet. I thought that was a little strange until I pulled down her pants and saw the largest diaper I had ever seen. I think it weighed 3 pounds! I looked at Jeff and his dad and asked if they had changed her diaper. They looked a bit dumbfounded, pointed fingers at each other and finally admitted that her diaper hadn't been changed... since I had changed it around 11am. Six hours and no one had bothered to change her diaper. It had leaked out onto her pants. In addition to the wet pants, she had sticky brown stuff on her face and hands. Apparently, she had a few pieces of candy and no one bothered to clean that up, either.

Jeff's dad wanted to take us out to eat that night. We got to the restaurant and I got the salad bar and so did Grandpa. We were sharing our food with Maya. Maya was eating anything we would put in front of her. I couldn't believe how hungry she was. I then thought about the state in which I found her earlier that day and asked, "Did anyone feed Maya lunch?" Once again, the dumbfounded looks appeared and I heard a "No." "So, she hasn't eaten anything since breakfast?" Jeff readily blamed his dad for not making the sandwich. Jeff's dad said he didn't remember anything about a sandwich.... I could feel my eyes rolling (on the inside) while they discussed how they didn't feed her all day.

The next morning, Jeff and Grandpa told me to sleep in, that they would take care of everything. I was so tired (Reili was crying until 1 am) that I slept in until 9:30am. When I got up, Maya was in her high chair, eating a mini candy bar. (The Halloween candy had been raided already) I readily assumed that she was sitting there eating candy for breakfast and I said, "Has anyone even fed her breakfast?!?" Jeff looked at me, once again dumbfounded, and said "No." ...then I heard a laugh... he was pulling my leg...that time!

Funny Mom Videos

2007-10-02T23:31:00.000-04:00

I never really thought of myself as "Mom" but I'm slowly evolving no matter how hard I try to be cool. Next, I will have to buy some mom jeans. These videos are for all those moms out there:

Mom Overture
Mom My Ride